CONTENTMENT
A Journey of Letting Go, Awakening, and Creative Expression
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There is something about childhood that stays with us as an adults.
We have most of the first experiences in our childhood.
The first kiss, witnessing the death of a grandparent, friendship, domestic fights and so on.
Our worldview is shaped in our childhood. And it reflects a lot in what and how we do things as grown-ups.
I still remember picking Indian gooseberries from my granduncle’s tree.
I used to sit in a busy square and sell it.
I must have been 8 or 9 at the time, but it gave me my first taste of money.
Later I started selling face packs to the school teachers.
I was making a handsome amount of money for a school kid.
Much of which I spent in internet cafes. It was a thing back then.
I use to watch porn, play games and chat with foreigners on IMC.
IMC was a chatroom where many people from around the globe would gather in rooms and chat.
This was a pre-Google era, and we had to remember the names of the sites we wanted to visit.
It was my window to the world outside my town.
The chats improved my typing speed at an early age, but also exposed me to world of information. The hottest commodity in the market.
People, Culture and Internet.
Reflecting on the era, I feel like I was destined to write and connect with the world online.
There are not many people I know who find beauty in little things.
People who can see the magnificence of perfectly imperfect life.
People who are interested in themselves and see the world from the inner eye.
The internet was about to become a source for a small-town boy to dream big.
To find genuine connections with beautiful souls.
Amid all the instances online, I wanted to own a corner.
A place where I could exchange insights.
Or just say hello to fellow travellers.
I was in love with the medium of the internet and hopeful that it has the potential to be in the company of like-minded people.
I have made several attempts in the last 10 years without any success.
Blogs, Websites and Social Media.
Even though everything failed, I consider myself a winner.
Every step I stumbled taught me to walk.
Every project I had to shut down, even after working relentlessly for 7 years, taught me something valuable.
Lessons I need to learn and revelations that are very insightful on the journey.
I have tried many businesses online and offline. No matter what the outcome was, it always kept me going.
The online world kept me motivated, if not inspired.
Life doesn’t always give you what you want. But I always had what I needed to keep up on the path.
Growth is natural.
Once you nurture a tree, it bears fruit. And it is the nature to replicate. To have more.
Like a tree has an inherent desire to bear more fruits and plant more seeds, my desire to be in front of my audience never subsided.
It’s an enchanted path. Full of mysteries.
I don’t see the faces of patrons. I don’t know the eyes that are reading this post.
I can’t read his mind, either, but you are here, and that is comforting.
A child in me is still enthusiastic about the world I can’t claim to understand.
The desire for growth compels us to go towards the danger.
We are drawn toward the mysteries of life.
And then there is a layer of conventional things.
Notions that are widely accepted and practices that are condemned. Tabu.
It took me a long time to accept this. Any artist desires that his work should be widely recognised and accepted.
But excellence is a far-fetched idea. It is the imperfection that makes us special.
It’s like buying the chase and not the catch. Success, if not a destination, is a journey.
An ongoing state of mind to be content with what you are doing right now.
I am enriched to have the privilege to be able to create.
Write and put it into the vast universe of the internet, and wait for something to come back.
Like the sunflower keeps staring at the sun, I stare into the possibilities.
Aware.
Aware that something is going to happen.
Their very reason to acknowledge the present moment is to accept the fact that it is going to pass.
You have to let go of this moment for the next to come.
Willingly or unwillingly.
I chose to let go.
The phenomenon of the soul having this human experience is incredible.
A part of me wants to be celebrated, A part of me wants to celebrate.
A part of me wants to be acknowledged, A part of me want to let go.
The magic happens when you let go.
What would you do when you let go of everything?
Your knowing, unknowing.
The doing seizes and happening begins.
I go for no every morning. I don’t start my day like the Gurus preach to live your life.
I wake up and say to myself, I will not do anything today.
No deliberate attempts to fit in a frame of conventional wisdom and current trends of what it means to live a meaningful life.
I start my day by rejecting everything.
And then, out of nowhere, something bigger than me took control.
I remain a mere instrument, and things begin to happen.
I write, sing, and dance.
This is what is required of me.
The present moment is the guide to the path of life. I don’t question the future and the past.
The question comes from the point of lack.
When you are enough, what else do you need?
Contentment.
I am surprised how life is turning out for me.
I allow myself to be surprised because I excuse myself from the worries of “What will happen?” and stand in the happening itself.
I sell Vadapav in market. I write. I sit in the garden. Read.
No matter where I go, it feels right.
Experiencing this life through the body is going to have a spectrum of experiences.
The body has needs. The body experiences pain and pleasure. The body suffers.
But you are not only your body.
You are the consciousness that is expanded beyond your physical being.
When you encompass the vastness of your being, the suffering is too minute that it feels like a tickle.
Bliss.
The awareness of this consciousness depends on how deeply rooted it is within yourself.
It predicts your view towards life.
You go deep to understand the journey of the body from birth to death.
You go deeper to understand the journey of the soul from body to body.
You have been born many times, and you have died many times.
You are born in every moment and die to it instantaneously.
Your soul has taken many bodies, forms and shapes.
The beauty of this understanding is such that once you realise the truth, you break the patterns.
Patterns of the mind, patterns of life and death.
You exit patterns of countless repetitions and stop the cycle of life and death.
Once you realise that you are energy, you remain energy.
The formality of occurrence diminishes. Only remains. Truth prevails.
If we seek to grow, we have to shed the old skin.
I no longer aspire to sell fruits on the streets and VadaPav in the market.
I seek to fulfil the deeper desires of this mind and body.
To connect to the stream of consciousness and let it flow into the physical realm.
To die to the every moment and be born to the every moment.
Taking birth and giving birth at the same time.
Rising as I fall.
Porn, Games and Chat rooms introduced me to the world of Internet.
I have outgrown that.
I post on social media sometimes, and I check only three accounts which I like.
I would rather spend my time in the garden.
The rose in the garden has survived the harsh summer of my town. It stunned me.
The rest of the time, I spend building a platform for my writing through this medium of blog and connecting with you.
The false hope and plastic notions of SEO, Value proposition, Market research and blah blah have subsided.
I am a human being willing to connect with you as a human.
That is enough for a person who values the precious gift of life.
Who appreciates the beauty of being in the moment?
Without facets of product placement and tinted glass materialism.
It is time for the internet to not only grow up but grow deep.
The family teaches us to grow up. Society demands us to man up.
We need to grow up innocent.
But no one tells us about the healing qualities of growing innocent.
It is okay to fail and take a rest.
Maturity comes when you acknowledge the fact that your physical being is not enough to take on every challenge in life.
Innocence is the root that grounds your being in life.
Roots that take you to the source of your being.
The source of the soul took on the journey to experience life in the body.
Life is a creative expression of the source.
The more you grow up, the more you face life.
The more you grow innocent, the more you are ready to face life with compassion and love.
As you become the source, the good, the bad and the ugly are part of you.
You are responsible for your experience of life.
Growing up is a physical process. Growing innocent is a metaphysical phenomenon.
Your spirituality is what makes you ready to see the world in a new light.
Life is no longer a challenge or a threat. It is a celebration.
Celebrate.
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Originally published at https://satyajett.blog on March 12, 2025.